One foot in, one out
You can’t defeat the demons you enjoy playing with.
Nearly every day, I talk to people that are in the midst of relationship struggles. Because of my willingness to be so vulnerable about my past, people often come to me to discuss their own challenges. I am so thankful to be provided the trust of so many, and honestly, this is why I share so openly and will never take it for granted when a person reaches out.
With that said, I want to address a common theme. Until YOU are ready to rid yourself of the toxic people and/or relationships in your life, they will always be there.
Looking back on my past relationship, the good days were all I had to hold on to. When the lows were extremely low, all I could do was close my eyes and pretend to see things getting better. In reality, it was a constant cycle. Like a drug addiction, I wanted to "get clean". But just like an addict, my "drug" (abusive partner) would take hold of me and the pattern would repeat itself. It wasn't until I got away for long enough that I was able to breath fresh air and see just how toxic and sick I was. In the end my faith, Jesus, and parents helped to pull me through this phase of life.
So where am I going with this?
I can provide advice and guidance until I am blue in the face, the same way my loved ones did for me when I was in such a dark place. It wasn't until I started praying, basically begging, for God to release me from my darkness that I began to notice things change. Before these daily prayers I had been holding onto false hope, just like many of the people who reach out to me on the daily basis.
My ask is that we each work to recognize that truth is the same in darkness as it is in the light. Look inward to shine light on the true source of your pain, hurt, and heartache. Surrender it all. Take two steps further. Don’t look back, you can leave it in the past. Give God your all and watch what He does with your future journey.
Friends, you are so worthy of the best love God has to offer. Listen to those who love you the most and pray for God to help open your eyes to the love and life that you deserve. Instead of running to an addiction when you feel the need to cover up, run to Jesus. Know that whatever vulnerability you are feeling, Jesus won’t push you away. He accepts you in his love and infuses you with his life. He exchanges your weakness for his strength. When you are vulnerable, Jesus is ABLE.
Keep shining, every day!